Weekly Update: January 28

Parents,

      Thanks to all of you who came out on Sunday to hear about YMT '09!! It was a great evening. If you missed it, visit the blog for the video intro and forms [Chaperone Interest Form and Deposit Form (coming soon). More information will be posted there as it comes available. Read below for more info on fundraising.

SUPER BOWL PARTY
      Bring a snack (based on last name, below) to the Jackson's and enjoy watching the big game. Go Cardinals!!

LAST NAMES:
A-F: fruit/vegetable
G-P: something salty
Q-Z: something sweet

YMT '09 FUNDRAISING || sign-ups in the Youth Room or Lobby
      Two big events are on our radar to help raise funds for YMT '09. The first is the Chili Cookoff, February 22 at 5:30 PM. Are you a chili pro? This event is for you! Make a pot and win the top prize. Or just eat a bowl and make a donation toward the YMT. Invite your friends and neighbors, and sign up to help setup, clean up or cook!
      Then March 22 will be the Silent Auction and Dinner. Do you know a business that could donate an item for the auction? We'll auction off vacation homes, dinner cooked by a professional chef in your home, sports memorabilia, and a whole lot more. But we need volunteers to solicit these donations from local businesses. If you're interested in volunteering, contact Jan Stinchfield or the GBC Office.
      And don't forget the gift card fundraiser! Visit ShopWithScrip.com and enter DD864BL119488. Their website is newly redesigned and easier to use than ever. Talk to Aaron about any questions. Orders will be placed twice a month.

restoreWEEKEND || March 6-8
sign-ups & forms are in the Youth Room and Lobby
      Middle schoolers. High schoolers. Get ready for restoreWEEKEND, our weekend in-town "retreat." This is an exciting weekend focused on small group interaction, large group worship and an exciting encounter with our Creator. Cost is $25 for the weekend and sign-ups end February 22. More details next week.

Until next week...

YMT '09: Port Sulphur, Louisiana

Ready for YMT '09? Watch the video and check back soon for more details!

Also, as per Phil's announcement at the YMT Info Meeting: download the Chaperone Info sheet, fill it out and return to the church by March 1. This information will be used to ensure chaperone needs are taken care of for this year's YMT!

Weekly Update: January 21

Weekly Update: January 14

Parents,

      There's excitement in the air! Make sure you mark Sunday night, January 25 on your calendar for our Youth Mission Trip Information Meeting for parents. This meeting will take place during engage, and the youth will also take some time hearing about this year's mission trip.

THIS SUNDAY: engage after-hours
      There's no school on Monday for Henrico, so we're hanging out after engage. We'll run the GBC Shuttle over to the Stumpf's house and hang out for a while, eat food, watch TV. You can pick your youth up anytime between 8-10 PM. This will be a great follow-up to our message this week on Communion and the community we form as a church and youth group!

RESUMING THIS SUNDAY: create
      The worship (beginning and intermediate) create groups will resume meeting this Sunday at 5PM. Stay tuned for other beginning soon!

LEARN THE LINGO
detagging = process of disassociating yourself with a picture posted on Facebook [this technique is used a lot so youth can "hide" certain things, behaviors, etc.]

Until next week...

aaron@gaytonbaptist.org

Weekly Update: January 7

Parents,

      I am excited to welcome you into a new year. As we get started, I want to take a step back to reflect. But before we do that, a reminder that engage kicks off again this Sunday night -- and in the month of January, we will take an intense look at baptism, communion and what grace means in '09. And...
      We are excited to welcome Melissa Strong -- to our church office, and to our youth ministry team. She will be supporting youth ministry in addition to other duties. Welcome, Melissa!

MIDDLE SCHOOL: Grapple
      Middle school Sunday school classes have started using Grapple this month. It is an exciting way for middle schoolers to "grapple" with their faith.
      Grapple includes an online component. Please download the Grapple intro and release form to read more. Release forms must be returned for your student to be given access to myGrapple. Return forms to Melissa or Aaron.

Question: When am I done parenting? Isn't most of it done by the time kids reach their teenage years?

Mark Oestreicher, President of Youth Specialties:
In one sense (and you all know this), you're never done being a parent. I called my dad this week (I'm in my 40s, by the way) to get his advice and prayer (or course, he does the same with me now). And parenting teenagers has, in reality, stretched well into a students 20s in most cases. Adolescence has extended on both ends of its age delineators.

But I have a couple theories I'd like to suggest you consider:

First, you should make this assumption--by the time your child is in HS, most of your parenting is done. That's not to say that you still don't have a very important role in her life--you do! But it's normally a bit late to "change course". Parenting an older teen (or young 20-something) is more about "staying the course". More about continuing to model what you've already set in place. [read more]

TEEN LINGO
99 = Text message short code for "Parent no longer watching."

A THOUGHT TO CONSIDER
"Sometimes we're so concerned about giving our children what we never had growing up, we neglect to give them what we did have growing up."
-James Dobson

Until next week...

When Am I Done Parenting?

Question: When am I done parenting? Isn't most of it done by the time kids reach their teenage years?

In one sense (and you all know this), you're never done being a parent. I called my dad this week (I'm in my 40s, by the way) to get his advice and prayer (or course, he does the same with me now). And parenting teenagers has, in reality, stretched well into a students 20s in most cases. Adolescence has extended on both ends of its age delineators.

But I have a couple theories I'd like to suggest you consider:

First, you should make this assumption--by the time your child is in HS, most of your parenting is done. That's not to say that you still don't have a very important role in her life--you do! But it's normally a bit late to "change course". Parenting an older teen (or young 20-something) is more about "staying the course". More about continuing to model what you've already set in place.

The reality I just proposed adds significant weight to this next reality:

You're on the last lap. Or, maybe the 2nd-to-last lap.

These tender years of 9 - 11 (pre-teen) and 11 - 14 (young teen) are some of the most formative years of life. Kids are still extremely moldable, changeable, open. But as they settle into their mid-teen identity, change come less and less often. This is why I always joke with middle school ministry workers that we are still in "preventive ministry", while high school work is often "corrective ministry."

What does a long-distance runner do in the final lap or two? Think of the finish line. Calibrate what needs to take place in this diminishing space. Then recalibrate. Continue to pace yourself and recalibrate again.

Don't forget these two extremely important facts:

1. You are still the #1 influence in the life of your child at this age. This will begin to shift to their peer group in the older teen years.
2. The almost-absurd amount of change going on in the life of you pre-teen/young teen places them at a small timeframe of massive malleability (yes, I realize it doesn't always seem that way - but it's true).
   

These two facts combine to make these final laps of the parenting race some of the most important of your God-given role.

So don't throw in the towel. Don't concede. Don't abdicate your role to the church or the culture or their peer group. Let God fill your lungs with a fresh air of strength and courage. And take another step. And another.

Mark Oestreicher is the president of Youth Specialties (www.YouthSpecialties.com), the leading provider of resources and training for Christian youth workers. Marko speaks to parents, teens and youth workers around the world, and writes books (mostly for youth ministry and young teens). He lives in San Diego with his wife, Jeannie, and his two kids, Liesl and Max.